Rethinking Gifts IV

In the 1984 movie The Karate Kid, Mr. Miyagi repairs Daniel LaRusso’s bicycle after a brutal assault on Daniel by a gang of bullies, letting him know that he matters. He then goes on to teach him the dangerous art of karate, letting him know that he trusts him to use it in a way that will not seek to harm others. The final gift he then presents Daniel blows him away! Mr. Miyagi handed him the keys to a beautiful yellow, classic car on his sixteenth birthday. This demonstrates that the older Miyagi has respect for and trusts the younger LaRusso to handle the responsibility wisely. Miyagi quietly but firmly delivers blows to the enemy who would crush his young pupil's heart.

Rethinking the Enemy IV

Left to their own devices, students often cannot see the good in themselves or in their families. Sometimes there is a tendency to focus on the negative. Students, when challenged, will often declare what they are not, instead of responding with who they are. Isn’t there a little bit of that in all of us? When a daunting challenge comes our way, do we meet it eagerly, with the anticipation of being able to use our gifts and talents to overcome the obstacle? Or do we start to doubt our abilities and say things like, “I don’t have the strength for this” or “I just can’t do it”? This has probably been the norm since you were young. See how the enemy starts its assault early in a person’s life?

Rethinking the Enemy III

Young people today have to decide whether or not they will agree with the voices that eventually lead to despair. If they start agreeing with statements like those, it won’t be long until they find themselves becoming more and more cynical and fatalistic about life in general.

Adolescents often verbalize those statements that they’ve agreed with, declaring that they are “unlucky” or “dumb.” It would be easy to dismiss those sentiments as nothing more than teen angst, but let’s look at what is really happening on a deeper level. For example, if Danielle is spurned by a boy that she really likes, she might be presented with the lie that she is “unlovable” or “unattractive.” If she, in her mind and heart, agrees with this assessment—however absurd—she will begin to behave as if she were unlovable or unattractive. This behavior in turn will invite others to treat her in the same way. In essence, we teach others how to treat us. When Danielle hears these messages from both herself and others around her, she may be tempted to evaluate other situations in her life through the same discouraging lens.

When Ted is cut from the basketball team, he might be exposed to the lie that he “will never amount to anything” or is “a failure.” Believing this lie, he might find himself fearful of trying new things, in an attempt to shield his heart from rejection.

Here we have two young people who have the potential to be great men or women, to live and love, perhaps affecting the lives of countless thousands or even millions. Instead, through the snare of agreeing with the villain in their stories, they find their hearts bound with the chains of cynicism, despair, depression, and fear. They lose, and the world loses. How does one overcome treacherous assaults such as these? No one wants to look at life with that kind of trepidation. So, how do we help young people avoid this pitfall?

Rethinking the Enemy II

When a discouraging situation occurs, there is always a choice to be made. Look at your own life. When something bad transpires, what happens next? A subtle voice speaking in your mind delivers a disparaging message—a fiery dart aimed right at your heart—suggesting:

• “That kind of thing always happens to me!”
• “I’m such an idiot!”
• “I just have bad luck.”
• “People will only like you if you look your best.”
• “Your friends are eventually going to leave you.”
• “I can never get it right.”
• “I am a bad person.”
• “Things will never change.”

For the purposes of this blog, we will refer to this “voice” as the villain in our story. We face an enemy in our lives, an enemy that is relentless and devious. You see, when we hear the voice of our adversary, in a split second, we have a decision to make. Notice how beguiling this is! Are you going to agree with the negative statement or not? We so often end up agreeing with these slanderous assaults against our character and our heart, though we are totally unaware that we are doing so.

When we end up depressed, fearful of certain situations, or cynical about life, we are left wondering how we got there. Just like any myth, fairy tale, or movie, the villain in our story is relentless, yet surprisingly subtle in its efforts to prevent us from realizing who we really are.